The Demons Inside
Copyright November 2005/ June 2008

Disclaimer: The characters Batman, Green Lantern, Hawkgirl, Wonder Woman, Martian Manhunter, Superman & Flash and their respective secret identities are all owned by DC Comics. This story is intended for my own pleasure and is not for profit. It has been posted to this site for others to read. Places and characters not own by DC Comics are my own creation. This story is based on characters from the animated Justice League series episode: "Destroyer" written by Dwayne McDuffie. This story contains references to "Contains Language" by Merlin Missy. My sincerest thanks to xffan_2000 for the read through; however, any mistakes she missed are mine. This story is a follow-up, but not a sequel to Private Conversation – A RUMOURS Story

A/N: If the characters seem out of character, then they probably are.

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The Demons Inside

Rating: R

(Language/ Violence/ Character death/ Implied rape)

Synopsis: Sometimes it's all about acknowledging mistakes and moving on. A John Stewart/ Shayera Hol story

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CHAPTER ONE

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And while I'm away

Dust out the demons inside

And it won't be long,

Before you and me run

To the place in our hearts

Where we hide. - (Elton John/Bernie Taupin/Davey Johnstone – I Guess That's Why They Call It the Blues)

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Phone calls at 2 A.M. generally don't bring good news. John Stewart had known that all of his life. So when the phone rang this time, awakening him from an uneasy slumber in his Detroit apartment, he wasn't surprised by the feeling of dread that came over him. He turned on the lamp on his night table, glancing at the framed photo of Mari.

It had been six days since her encounter with the Shadow Thief; four days since the omega-level alert to defeat Darksied and two days since she left for a photo shoot in Milan despite her wounds...and John's protest.

"Hello," he said, trying not to anticipate anything, but hoping it wasn't Mari calling to say they were finished as a couple. Her reaction to his telling her that he'd seen a future where he and Shayera had had a child surprised him. He had expected her to be happy with the news that he was staying with her despite what he'd seen. Surprisingly, she had not been happy with the news at all and had been decidedly cool toward him afterwards for reasons he could not understand.

"Hey, John, it's Mace." It was Rex Mason, Metamorpho, on the phone. The needle on John's comfort meter started rising because it wasn't Mari, but immediately fell again as he realized it must be bad news for Mace to call so late.

"Mace, what's up?"

"Hate to wake you, pal, but I figured you'd want to know as soon as I found out. Captain Robinson's daughter, Peggy, called. He passed away last night."

Stewart greeted the news with silence. Robinson had been one of his company officers when Stewart and Mason were in the Marine Corps together years ago. The much older Robinson, who had once been a war prisoner, had taken a liking to the young private and never missed an opportunity to impart a little "old school" wisdom to the lad or tell him of his experience as a prisoner of war.

"If you fight alone, you die alone," Stewart said.

"Huh?"

"Sorry. Just thinking about something the Captain once said to me a long time ago. When's the funeral?"

"Tomorrow," Mace answered. "No! Wait! It's this afternoon at 3 PM. I completely forgot that it's morning already. Yeah, it's this afternoon at the base chapel at Fort Lee outside of Gotham. Guess I'll see you there." He paused. "I'm sorry, John," he said, then he hung up.

"So am I," John said as he hung up the phone and stared mindlessly across the room. Robinson had said something else that Stewart never forgot. "You can't change your fate, Private. You can't erase your name from the bullet it's written on, but you can change your destiny by killing the gunman before he fires that round."

The old Captain had been right, Stewart reflected as he settled back down under the covers. John had made a career out of being aggressive, not accepting things as presented and always challenging assumptions. And yet after he saw a future where he and Shayera had a son, he momentarily did consider not challenging it and accepting what he saw. Then the Captain's words kicked in like a punch to the gut and it made him more determined than ever to stay with Mari - not so much out of love, but out of spite for a preordain destiny. A desire to kill the gunman, more or less, before he kills me.

He looked at the framed photo of Mari on his nightstand and before turning out the light, wondered for the first time if the Captain had given him bad advice.

The funeral earlier in the day for Captain Robinson had been brief and to the point. It was kind of like the man, John thought. He'd worn his Green Lantern garb, complete with the ceremonial cloak. Afterwards, the Captain's daughter, Peggy, mentioned that her father had been so proud of Stewart for being a Green Lantern.

"Thank you," John said. "He was a big influence in my life."

"He knew that," Peggy said as she pushed her grayish-blonde hair off her forehead. She was a cute, stocky woman about John's age and bore a striking resemblance to her father when she smiled. "He'd talk about you often. Whenever he'd see you on the news he'd often shout out to anyone in earshot that you two served together. Honestly? Sometimes it made me jealous." She laughed the easy laugh that reminded John of her father, paused and handed him a newspaper clipping. "Remember this?"

John recognized it immediately and nodded. It was a recounting of John stopping the runaway train that had barreled out of control into Gotham station. Rex Mason, before he became Metamorpho, had been on that train.

"Daddy was on that train. He always thought that you saved that train because he was on it. He figured that no matter what, you always managed to save your friends. But he was one of those taken to the hospital after the wreck, so he never got a chance to thank you, so I will say it for him. Thank you for saving my dad and considering him a friend."

John didn't have the heart to tell her that he didn't know Robinson or Mason were on the train. Instead, he smiled and just softly said, "Thank you for telling me and you're welcome." He paused. "I'm afraid I have to go. Please take care of yourself and again, I'm so sorry for your loss - - our loss."

As he turned to leave, there was a *click* in his ear and he said, "Go ahead."

"Batman here. I need your help. Now! Home in on my signal. Batman out!"

John frowned. There were times when Batman could be a great guy, although he couldn't recount many of them, and then there were time when he could make you hate him because of the way he treated friends and colleagues. This was one of those times. The curtness crap from Bats was aggravating. And at this moment, Stewart didn't need the irritation. He nodded to Mason before leaving and then once outside, leaped into the air and followed Batman's signal.

It was mid-evening in Gotham, the time of day when the city was its most beautiful --and its most dangerous. The planet Venus sparkled in the southwestern sky. John found Batman on a rooftop overlooking a busy street corner in Gotham. Where else would he be, but on a rooftop?

John landed behind the cowled figure and approached as quietly as he could on foot. Batman didn't move, but instead remained focused on the street corner below. As Stewart pulled abreast of him, Batman said without looking at him, "What kept you?"

John smirked. "Glad to see you, too. You said you needed my help. What's up?"

Batman gave him a tight-lipped frown and looked back to the street. "I wanted your help with that." He pointed to the stores across the street. "See the jewelry store?" he said. "There'll be an attempted robbery there in about ten minutes. I'm going in through the skylight. Need you to cover the back."

"What happened to your junior partners?" John knew that term irritated Bats.

"They're not available," Batman said not taking his eyes off the street below. He paused and then surprised John completely when he said, "So why'd you tell Shayera about Warhawk?"

John's jaw dropped and then he frowned. "What... the... hell? I have no idea where that came from and not that it's any of your business, but I thought she should know."

John didn't mention that once he'd told her of a future he wasn't going to work toward, he suddenly felt much better, as if a large weight had been lifted off his shoulders. The feeling was short-lived, however, once he told Mari in her hospital bed of that future. She hadn't taken it as well as he'd hoped and it was probably the reason he hadn't heard from her in the last two days she'd been gone.

"Did you know Shayera came to me and asked me to tell her about him?" Batman said, maintaining his gaze on the street below. There was clear annoyance in his voice as he continued, "When I told her to talk to you, she said she couldn't because you said you were going to stay with Vixen."

"Like I said, I thought she should know. I didn't think she'd come to you, but I thought she needed to know that I'm staying with Mari." John tried to show as much irritation as possible in his voice as he added, "Again, not your business!"

Batman shook his head in that ever so slight way he had. "Wrong Lantern! You made it my business when you couldn't keep the future you saw to yourself. Shayera didn't need to know anything about what you saw. She thinks you told her about her son just because you wanted to hurt her for hurting you during the invasion."

"Don't push it, Batman!" John snapped.

"No! Don't you push it! I don't know if you're trying to punish her for dating Hall or for hurting you during the invasion and I don't care." He paused half a beat before continuing. "You want to drive a spear through her heart, go ahead. But you will not make me the spear tip, Lantern! Is that understood?"

John stopped cold. This was a new thought. Did he really tell Shayera about Warhawk to hurt her after she dated Carter Hall? Until this moment he'd convinced himself that his intentions had been honorable in telling her he wasn't obligated to the future he saw. "Look, I didn't know she was going to come to you. And I had no ...."

He stopped.

On second thought, he didn't have to explain a damn thing to anyone, especially Batman. He'd told Shayera what she needed to hear and he felt better because he did. Shayera would live her life and he would live his and he didn't owe an explanation to anyone. Besides if she had a problem with what he said, she should have said something to him, not Bats.

Batman seemed to ignore him as he pointed to the store below. "The one I want just arrived. There are three inside now," he said. "His accomplices will run out the back of the store. Don't let them get away."

"After what you just said, do you really think I'm going to help you now?"

Batman didn’t look at him. "I'm going in through the skylight on the roof. They'll let you know when I'm inside."

John watched as Batman shot a grappling hook across the street and swung toward the jewelry store without saying another word. John muttered to himself for a moment before taking off and landing in the alley behind the store. He'd been there only a few moments, when the noise and loud voices coming from inside the store let him know that Batman was inside.

Then there was gunfire.

Using his ring, John smashed the back door with a giant green mallet, knocking it off its hinges and inside the store. He stood in the doorway. It was dark inside and hard to make out the moving figures. He was about to ring a flashlight when one of the gangsters rushed toward him. He started to form a boxing glove with his ring to smack the thug when he heard Batman yell, "Lantern! Lookout!"

Dammit!

There was something in John's eyes. It must be the dust from knocking down the door. He blinked for a moment, then hit the thug with the boxing glove knocking him back into the store. He entered the building, grabbed the crook by his collar with a ringed pair of green pliers and dragged the unconscious man to the center of the store where Batman had two criminals stacked in a pile near a jewelry display case.

"Here's your third man," John snapped. "Now, I've had a long and a very bad day. But the next time one of your junior partners has a date or needs to stay home to study for their junior high school math tests, don't hesitate to call me." He threw his man on top of the other two and added, as sarcastically as possible, "On second thought, do hesitate!"

Batman frowned another one of those frowns and stared at him in silence.

John returned the glare, then spun around and leaped in the air.

"Lantern! Wait! Hold on!" he heard Batman call out behind him. It sounded like a plea.

Tough!

"Go to hell!" John snapped. He turned and headed for the Metrotower.  

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CHAPTER TWO

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Stewart sat down on the sofa next to Wally who had his feet propped up on the coffee table and nervously fingered the remote control for the TV. "All I'm saying," Wally said, "is that who she dates is not our business. We don't get to approve her friends."

John couldn't remember how the conversation had drifted to Shayera's dating of Hall, but it had. All he knew was that the subject depressed him and Batman's comments earlier in the night didn't do much to make him feel better.

Stewart shook his head. "I'm not talking about approving anybody. I don't care who she dates."

Wally looked up and smirked. "Dang, dude. You just spoke two sentences and I know at least one of them was an out and out lie."

Stewart was silent.

"Look GL," Wally said. "None of us want to see her get hurt. But maybe it's time for her to step out and mingle…you know, build a life for herself ...you know...without your presence." Stewart threw Wally a sharp glare which Wally ignored. It was then that John wondered if Wally also knew about his conversation with Shayera after the defeat of the Shadow Thief.

"I mean," Wally continued, "she can't stay locked up in the Watchtower or the Metrotower all the time. And we can't, nor should we be her only friends. I mean all of us, except her, you know, socialize outside of work. She doesn't and even I know that's just not healthy."

Stewart took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "Maybe I ought to pay him a visit at his museum."

Wally coughed. "Who? Hall?"

Stewart said nothing and Wally shook his head, "Man, I can't begin to tell you how bad an idea that is. What are you going to tell him? Keep his hands to himself and have her home by ten?"

"No!" Stewart pursed his lips together into a tight line as he folded his arms across his chest. "Hell, I don't know." His frown deepened.

Wally smirked. "See, that's the problem. Tell you what, why don't you have Vixen tell him or did you forget about her?"

"I didn't forget about Mari," Stewart snapped back, perhaps too quickly he thought in hindsight. He lowered his head and sighed. "It's just that," he paused recalling the sad memory, "on the day Shayera killed Grundy, there were a lot of people in the crowd who were still angry and cursing at her for the invasion. You weren't there, but I was. She is still the invasion to a lot of people."

"She'll always be the invasion, GL, just like people will never forget that Superman went rogue once despite all the good he's done since or that our counterparts killed the President of the United States in another dimension." Wally stood and walked over to the shelf next to the DVD player. He carefully examined the pile of DVDs there. He turned back to John and said, "Remember what you said after we defeated the Secret Society?"

As Stewart struggled to recall his words, he wondered if in fact he wasn't being too concerned about Shayera's boyfriend, even if she didn't call him that. Damn Batman for putting that thought in his head. After all, he'd told Shayera he was staying with Mari because she needed to know, didn't she? They were just friends now, right? He had no hold on her and no right to interfere. He didn't tell her about Warhawk to keep her from dating Hall or to pay her back for hurting him during the invasion and yet....

It all boiled down to Warhawk. The very existence of Warhawk was the problem, wasn't it?

"Sixty-five is the new thirty."

Those words had bothered Stewart since he first heard Static say them during his trip fifty years into future. Yes, sixty-five could be the new thirty and maybe that meant fifty was the new twenty.

The man who'd introduced himself as Warhawk and Rex Stewart looked to be in his early thirties, late twenties. Was it possible that he was older than that and just looked younger. Maybe he was forty.

Then Stewart froze. Maybe Warhawk was even fifty when John met him. After all, because of his encounter with the Shadow Thief he knew that Shayera was older than she looked. Maybe Rex Stewart had her genes for youthful appearance.

What if Warhawk was fifty? That meant he was conceived….

He didn't complete the thought as he shook his head at Wally indicating he didn't remember what he'd said after the defeat of the Secret Society.

If Wally saw confusion in Stewart's face, he didn't show it as he continued, "You said, 'All we can do is say we're sorry and move on.' That all she can do, John. That's all any of us can do. We acknowledge our errors and hope we don't repeat them. We make peace with ourselves and live our lives trying to grab all the happiness we can."

Stewart's jaw dropped and Wally grinned. "Don't look at me like I have three eyes. You said it, not me." He selected a disc from the stack on the shelf. "Hey, I see we got some new DVD's up here. Want to see this one?"

"What is it?" Stewart asked.

"Vanilla Sky."

Stewart stood up. "No. I'm sure it's a good movie and all, but…" He headed for the door without finishing his thought. He had to call Mari.

John didn't see Shayera walk in and he literally bumped into her, almost knocking her over as he was approaching the door. She growled for a moment, then surprisingly smiled. "Hey," she said softly.

"Hi," he answered. He rubbed the back of neck with his ring hand and stopped as he became aware of the nervous gesture.

"I have watch later tonight," she said. "Thought I'd come in here and watch some TV before I went on. What are you guys doing?"

"About to watch the 2001 movie, Vanilla Sky," Flash volunteered.

A wisp of a smile across her face. "Oh, that's the movie Carter gave me. I thought it was pretty good." She paused and turned to John, "Were you leaving? I mean you weren't leaving, were you?"

Stewart shrugged a small smile. "Actually I was. Why? Did you have something?"

She seemed a little taken back by his question. She cleared her throat and scratched her left ear. "No. I liked the movie and thought...well, maybe...we'd...I'd watch it with you...with you both."

Wally glanced at Stewart, then back to Shayera. "With us? You never socialize with us! At least, not recently." He zipped up to her. "Who are you and what have you done with the real Shayera?"

She suddenly looked uncomfortable and her tone changed sharply. "Look, I just thought I would spend some time with my friends, but if this is a bad idea or you two want some more male bonding time just say so." She turned and headed for the door.

Wally raced to the door blocking her exit. He grinned. "Just kidding. It's a great idea. It'll be like old times, well, almost like old times. I'll get the popcorn. How long is the movie?"

"About an hour and a half," she answered. She looked at Stewart. "What about you, John? Are you going to watch the movie?"

Stewart tried to smile, but failed miserably as he moved back into the room and sat down at the far end of the sofa. "Sure. It will be like old times, like Wally said." Wally raised an eyebrow at Stewart and said, "Great! I'll be right back." He then quickly grinned at Shayera and then zipped down to the kitchen to get the popcorn.

Shayera turned around and stared at Stewart before sitting down at the other end of the sofa. They were both silent, staring straight ahead, purposefully not looking at each other, like two twelve year olds at their first coed dance. No, Wally was wrong, Stewart reflected. It wasn't like old times, it was worse.

In the old days John and Shayera always found something to talk about. But, after her return to the League, it was a struggle to have a conversation with her that didn't degrade into her reminding him he was involved with Vixen. It seemed to him that she was using Mari to ensure he kept his distance.

John sighed as he reflected that Batman must have been out of his mind. He hadn't hurt Shayera by saying he was staying with Mari. After all, she'd showed no signs of being still interested in him after she returned. Besides, he reminded himself, all he'd done was just tell her why he had been so distance around her lately. But if that was all there was to it, why was he still trying to convince himself he'd done the right thing?

Finally, Stewart said absently, "Wonder what's taking Wally so long with the popcorn?"

She smirked, "Well it does take two or three minutes to pop, you know." John flashed a faint smile and then frowned. She shrugged and looked straight ahead again. John sighed loudly and said, "Let me ask you something. You've seen this movie before, right?"

She nodded.

"Why," he continued, "do we sit through a movie when we know how it's going to end? I mean suppose you were one of the characters in a movie and you thought you knew how the movie would end. Would you continue to say your lines, continue acting as if you were unaware of what the future held for you? I mean knowing that things may not turn out the way you want them to...knowing that you may not get what you want."

Her eyes narrowed. He wished at that moment that she still wore her mask. It was better not seeing the hint of anger so plain in her face. "This isn't about Vanilla Sky, is it?" she said. "What are you trying to say?"

Dammit! He knew what he wanted to say; what he was trying to say, but he realized he'd totally screwed it up.

Wally zipped back into the room carrying a large bowl of freshly popped popcorn. He smiled as he set the bowl down on the table. "Here we go, hot popcorn. I'll set this down and start the ...." He rapidly scanned the room, apparently noting the silence and Shayera's and Stewart's dour faces. He sighed loudly. "Man, you two are worse than two year olds. I swear I can't leave you two alone for two point five minutes. What did I miss?"

Stewart shook his head as he stood up. "You didn't miss anything, hotshot. I think you're right on time." He looked at Shayera. "I guess I'm saying I'm tired. Look, enjoy the movie. I think I'm going to go home. Tell Hall I said thanks for the movie. I'll make a point of seeing it again the next time I have duty."

Stewart headed for the exit, but stopped when he heard her call out, "Go ahead." He turned around and saw her standing with a finger pressed to her ear. She was silent as she listened.

"Got it," she said. "I'm on my way." Then looking at Wally she said, "Got to go. Duty calls."

Stewart stood next to the door and before allowing her to pass said softly, "Be careful out there, okay?"

She looked puzzled as she answered, "Don't worry about me. I can take care of myself."

"I know you can take of yourself," he said softly as he stepped aside to allow her to pass. And then for reasons he wasn't sure he understood, he added after she was out of earshot, "But it doesn't mean you shouldn't be careful."

Shayera worked hard to suppress a smile that wanted to break into an outright laugh. For the last hour or two, Rex Mason, also known as Metamorpho, had regaled her with stories about his days with John while they both were in the Marine Corps. He'd also told her about John's friendship with his recently deceased former company officer, Captain Robinson.

She'd always enjoyed Rex's stories. They'd worked together a couple of times since she'd rejoined the league, but this was the first time they'd gone on a deep space mission together.

Now, forty-eight hours later, as they returned from completing their assignment, she enjoyed hearing tales of this side of John, a side he didn't show often enough to the rest of the world. She leaned back and listened to Rex spin his yarn.

"Yeah," Rex said. "Old Captain Robinson was really fond of John and John took everything the old man said to heart. One time the Captain asked John if he knew the difference between loving someone and being in love with someone."

"What did John say?"

"He said, 'Not sure, sir.' Well the old Captain threw his hands in the air like he was trying to pull God down from the heavens to ask him what was wrong with the man. The Captain then frowned at John and said, 'Lad, I love my dog, but if she ever bites me I will shoot her in a heartbeat. But I'm in love with my wife. If she bites me I'm pretty sure I won't shoot her.' Then he smiles and says, 'At least, not without thinking about it for five or ten minutes.'"

Shayera eyes widened and she smiled slightly. "Well, I guess that explains everything about John I need to know, doesn't it?"

Rex grinned and gently shook his head. "I don't expect you to fully get the joke. It’s just a little Marine humor. All I'm saying is that John's complicated, but at least you know where part of it came from." He looked back at her from the pilot's chair and asked, "Hey, you want to fly for a while?"

Shayera shook her head. "No, you need the flight hours."

Rex continued to look forward, adjusting the flight control knobs. "Well, I know you prefer to be up front in the pilot's chair with your phobia and all. I was just asking."

Shayera bristled. "What do you mean my phobia and all? I don't have any phobias."

"Hey, I'm sorry," Rex offered. "Maybe my intel was faulty. I was told to make sure you always had a view out of a window because of your claustrophobia."

"And who told you that?"

"The guy I've been talking about for the last two hours. He told me last week, if I ever work with you to make sure you either piloted or had a window, preferably on the left."

"John said that last week? Why?"

Rex shrugged his shoulders. "Don't know. You know how them ring jockeys are sometimes --real control freaks. You know, makes me wonder what would happen if they suddenly went renegade like Superman did."

Shayera nodded silently, not admitting that she'd wondered the same thing more than once over the last couple of years.

"Anyway, I don't think his comment was specific to this assignment, but the man does seem to know a lot about you. I wonder if he – " Rex stopped. So did the Javelin as it violently shook and dropped to sub-light speed, then stopped.

His jaw dropped as his eyes were fixed on the starboard side of the ship. Within the space of a heartbeat, Shayera screamed, "Open fire and get us out of here."

Rex exclaimed, "Great Mother of God! Do you see how big they are?"

As Shayera leaped to the front of the ship and punched the buttons initiating the automatic defensive systems she yelled again, "I said open fire! Now!"

"What happened?" John bellowed as he pushed past the Watchtower teleporter attendant to get to Mister Terrific. He stood near the transporter pads frowning, but meeting John's angry glare.

"Lantern, calm down," he answered. "I don't have the full debrief yet, but apparently twenty-two hours ago they stopped and boarded the Javelin and took her. Then they destroyed the long-range communications array and damaged the hyperdrive on the ship so that Metamorpho couldn't call for help. He did a commendable job getting the ship back to our solar system where we could pick up his distress call."

"Calm down?" John roared. He pointed his finger in Terrific's face. "How in the hell am I supposed to calm down. This is your fault. How could you let this happen? Why the hell would anybody send Shayera on a deep space mission in the first place, knowing the danger she could be in? You're the damn smart one! Don't tell me you didn't know there was still trouble out there for her? She trusted you – I trusted you, dammit!"

Mister Terrific looked down at the finger and then slowly into John's eyes. "She saw nothing wrong with going and I didn't see a reason not to send her. It was a routine mission. She had the lead and Metamorpho was support. There was no risk of any Thanagarians being out there."

Just as John was about to call Terrific a liar, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around to stare into the sad face of the Martian. What was he doing here?

As if in answer to John's unspoken question, J'onn said, "Mister Terrific called me, Lantern. The mission appeared safe, I assure you."

John didn't attempt to disguise the rage in his voice as he turned back to Terrific. "Well it wasn't safe, was it? The Thanagarians are scattered everywhere, now that Thanagar has fallen and she has a price on her head. Damn you, man!! What were you thinking? You didn't think the Thanagarians would be lurking out there to kill her for her betrayal."

J'onn shook his head. "Lantern, it wasn't the Thanagarians that took her. It was the Gordanians."

John's jaw dropped.

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CHAPTER THREE

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As she moved to sit up, Shayera noticed two things. First her head hurt. At least that meant she was still alive, didn't it? It was a throbbing ache that made Hol rub both of her temples with her fingertips in a circular motion trying to make the pain go away.

It wouldn't go leave.

It was the same pain she had when she and John were gassed on that ship as they were looking for Superman and J'onn.

J'onn!

She remembered that J'onn had been able to find John over half a galaxy away when he'd been taken by the Manhunters to stand trial for the destruction of Alturis Four. But J'onn couldn't gently read her mind the way he could the others. But he'd told her that he could hear her when she was trapped in Doctor Destiny's dream. So, maybe that meant she could reach him if she concentrated hard enough. Yes that was it. She'd have to try to mentally call out to him.

Secondly, she was naked and cold. She frowned. This did not portend good things. She took in her surroundings. It was a large room with a single bright light overhead and silver colored metallic walls. The flooring, except for the six foot square patch she was laying on, was metal grating. There were no tables, chairs or anything of note in the room – except for two Gordanian guards standing next to the door. There was a blue smock similar to an Earth hospital gown on the floor next to her.

This would be a standard Gordanian induction procedure for prisoners of war. But isn't the war over? Her yellow and black costume lay in shreds at her feet. Had they cut her clothing off? She looked down quickly and didn't see any cuts or marks on her. Her frown deepened.

There was a steady hum in the room. Was she on a spacecraft? Is that the noise she heard? Engines? If so, the floor should be vibrating. She placed both palms down on the floor, then on the metal grating. Yes! Vibrations! She was on a ship.

One of the guards approached and using his laser stick toss the blue smock in her face. The smell of the Gordanians sickened her. She mentally fought to ignore the odor and concentrated on remembering her training and her conversations with Hro: First isolation, interrogation then death or slave labor.

She reached for the smock and immediately felt pain in her upper back and shoulders. Her wings! She couldn't spread her wings. She looked down behind her and saw that her wings had been banded together in a device similar to that used by Doctor Destiny in that dream... in that nightmare. It was a known restraint device used by the Gordanians against Thanagarians prisoners. She remembered telling John that it was so effective that the Thanagarians copied it and used it against their own when the need arose.

She managed to get the smock on despite every muscle in her shoulders screaming for relief. As she stood up, one guard opened the door and stood in the hallway. The other guard, who had a massive scar on his chest, shoved her forward and out the door. She started thinking of words she could utter or think to help J'onn locate her.

If they were looking for her.

Suddenly she had her doubts. What if they weren't looking for her? Maybe they were happy that the Gordanians had apparently solved the Shayera Hol question for the League...for John. After all, with her gone, John would be free to have the future he wanted without fearing she'd complicate it by being around. But still....

John would look for her, wouldn't he? After all, he did go look for Katma when she was missing on Kalidor. Certainly, he'd come after her as well. Yes, John would and maybe even J'onn. Yeah, she'd have to believe that. But until she physically saw one of them again, she'd have to take her destiny into her own hands. She wasn't going to wait for someone to rescue her. She'd have to rescue herself.

As she started walking in the direction the Gordanians pushed and prodded her to walk, she started concentrating: J'onn. Here. J'onn. Here!

Rex Mason lay in the infirmary. His eyes were closed, but he was wide-awake. He hated the infirmary as much as any Leaguer and he felt especially bad being here now. Mr. Terrific had insisted that the medical staff check him over. Yes, he was physically okay, but he would never get over the look he saw in Shayera's face when the Gordanians boarded the Javelin. It was a look he would carry to his grave.

"Are you okay?"

Mason opened his eyes. It was John. His expression was flat. Mason matched it.

"I'm fine, mad as hell, but I'm fine. When are we going after her?"

John shook his head. "Mace, you're not going anywhere. You need to rest. I'm leaving after I talk to J'onn again. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Can you tell me what happened?"

Mason closed his eyes. "We were on our way back from Alteran Six. It was a routine mission to hand over an escaped criminal named Garbin back to the local authorities. It was easy. It was on the way back that we ran into problems. Suddenly, the ship dropped out of hyper-space down to sub-light and stopped. Then this group of ships, maybe six of them, really big ships, were on top of us. John, I swear I never saw them on the scanner. They just appeared out of nowhere."

Mason shook his head. "As soon as she saw the ships, Shayera started cussing. Maybe she was speaking her native language, I couldn't tell. But I can tell you this, John, she didn't like it."

Mason hung his head. "They must have done a bio-scan on the ship. Before we knew what to do next, three, maybe four of these lizard-like guys materialized behind us on board the Javelin, pointed these stick-like weapons at us and fired. Shayera deflected some of the laser fire with her mace and I know I killed one, but I guess I got hit by some laser fire or some sort of neutralizer. I don't remember a thing after being hit except coming to and Shayera and the ships were gone and I was alone."

"They left her mace, John," he said pointing to a chair in a corner of the room. "All they left was her mace."

John slowly walked over to the chair and picked up the mace, keeping his back to Mason. Rex didn't have to be a telepath to sense the overwhelming sadness in John as he held the weapon in his hand. John cleared his throat and then turned to face Mason again, holding the weapon at his side.

Mason gritted his teeth and took a deep breath, exhaling loudly before continuing. "They destroyed the long range communications system and the primary hyper drive system on the Javelin. I was lucky they didn't take out life support or the secondary systems. I immediately headed back here as soon as I could on the auxiliary systems."

Mason raised his head, looking John in the eyes. "John, I wish there was something I could have done. I've gone over and over in my head what else I could have done…should have done differently." He paused. "Man, I'm sorry…I'm so goddamn sorry. I know how close you were…are."

John nodded. "I'm sure you did all you could. It's okay, Mace, I'll find her."

Mason got out of the bed and stood. "We'll find her!"

John frowned and shook his head. "You're not up to this, man." He cleared his throat. "You stay here!"

Mason matched John's frown. "Wrong answer, bud. We'll find her and we'll bring her back because I am going with you. This was also my mission. Two Leaguers went out and the mission's not finished until two Leaguers come back. We never leave a man behind, right? We didn't do in the Marines and we don't do it in the Justice League."

John looked at Mason hard for a moment, saying nothing. A tight lipped smile came across his face. "Okay then. Let's see J'onn."

The Gordanian guard pushed Shayera into a cell. Because of the band on her wings, she lost her balance and hit the floor hard with a thud. As the cell door closed behind her, she felt a couple of hands on her shoulders. She looked up into the faces of three women -- three unmasked Thanagarians in smocks like hers. None of the women smiled at her.

Hol looked around the room. There were four beds in the cell pushed against the wall. Each bed had a mattress, small pillow and a blanket. There was a toilet and a washbasin in a corner of the cell. The door of the cell was solid metal with a sliding viewport about six feet off the deck. There was a single low wattage light in the ceiling. She looked back at the women. The smallest one had long black hair; the other two had short red hair. All were thin.

The small black-haired woman pointed to one of the beds and said, "That one is yours." Hol stood up shakily and walked to the designated bed. The three women followed and clustered around her as she sat down. Hol, looking up into the group of unsmiling faces said to the small black haired woman, "Thanks. My name is Shayera Hol and you are?"

"Ces. Corporal Nurita Ces and that's Sergeant Kyr Rac." Pointing to the taller of the two red-haired women she added, "That's Mayeca Wor. She's a civilian nurse. They were captured on Omega Nine…maybe six weeks ago. I was taken on Gamma Four, maybe two or three days earlier. It's hard to tell time here. How about you?"

"Corporal, shut up! You talk too much," the one called Rac yelled. Then she looked at Hol. "I'm in charge here and I'll ask the questions."

Hol's eyes widened, then she nodded in understanding. "You just used your military rank," Hol said. "I thought the war was over. That begs the question, where are we?"

"You aren't paying attention, are you?  I said I'll ask the questions," Rac growled. "I've seen you somewhere before. What unit are you with?"

Hol cleared her throat. "I'm not in the military. A friend and I were on our way back from Alteran Six when they board my ship and took me off." And for the first time since she regained consciousness, she realized she hadn't been as concerned about Rex's fate as perhaps she should have been. She hoped he was okay.

"On your way back to where?" Rac asked, her eyes narrowing.

Hol lowered her head. "A small planet called Terra." She paused. "Earth."

J'onn. Here. J'onn. Here.

"Terra? I was once garrisoned on a planet called Terra before the war ended." Rac paused, looking hard at Hol. It was clear she was trying figure out where she'd seen Hol before.

Hol took a deep breath, knowing this was not going to end well. "I don't recall meeting you. Are we on a prison ship?"

"We're prisoners," Ces answered. "That's the only thing we know for sure. I personally think it's a Gordanian pleasure ship and … we're supposed to be the pleasure. We have other task during the day and then one of us each night gets selected for ... gets selected to be used."

Hol's eyes narrowed. "Used?"

Rac suddenly growled at Hol. "I know where I know you from you. I saw your poster on my ship as the fleet was retreating." Rac turned and looked at the other women and pointed back at Hol, "Meet Lieutenant Shayera Hol, the traitor of Thanagar. She's the one that prevented the last link of the bypass from being built on that worthless little crap hole of a planet. Take a good look at her. She's the reason we're here."

"Wait a minute," Hol said as she started to stand. "That planet had people on it and the bypass would have- -"

Rac slapped Hol in the face -- hard cutting her off and knocking her back down on the bed.

Rac's voice trembled. "Every third night for six weeks I've been somebody's whore because you thought more about those people than you did about your own kind. Well now, there's finally some justice. You're the fresh meat here. They'll come for you tonight and they'll hurt you. And you'll fight them and they'll hurt you more... a lot more just to hear you cry out. But they won't kill you no matter how much you want to die. And when they finish with you, they'll throw you in a sonic shower, but that won't wash the stench of them off you. Then they'll toss you back in here and you'll want to vomit from the smell of them, but you'll find you can't. Then they'll come back for you in a couple of days and they'll do it all over again. Yeah, Lieutenant, you're going to pay starting tonight."

Hol sat up, glared at Rac as she rubbed the side of her face where the woman had slapped her. Ces stepped next to Hol and looked down at her, "Is what she said true? Are you an officer? Are you a traitor?"

"I did what I thought was right," Hol answered as she stood up looking Ces in the eyes. "I was an officer, but I was stripped of my rank and exiled."

Wor, who had been standing silently, turned, walked away and sat down on another bed as she said, "Stripped of your rank and exiled, huh? I guess some of you officer types would consider that a fair exchange. But tell you what Lieutenant; you tell me in the morning, if you can talk, if you still think it was a fair trade."

He'd been in this conference room so many times in the past, John had lost count. Recently, that is, until he told her about staying with Mari, Shayera had made a point of sitting next to him during the meetings and he liked that. It was almost like old times. And although he didn't want to admit it, he liked it when she would come into the room, look at him, smile, then sit down next to him.

As he sat down, he glanced to where Shayera would have sat if she were there. Mason, who had accompanied him into the conference room, apparently misinterpreted that glance as a signal as to where he should sit. Stewart said nothing as Mason sat down next to him.

Stewart placed Shayera's mace on the table and it made a disturbing, heavy metallic sound. She'd brandished the weapon so easily that he often forgot how heavy it actually was. He frowned. He was impatient and didn't care who knew it.

"The others should be here within the hour," J'onn said apparently reading John's mind.

John's response was sharp and quick. "I'm not waiting! They already have at least a twenty hour head start. Can you sense where she might be? Are you picking up anything?" John asked. It was more of a plea than a question.

The Martian sadly shook his head. "I sense nothing. But that might mean that she's unconscious, not dead. She might be too far away for me to sense anything."

John stood up quickly and leaned over the table. "She's not dead," he stated emphatically as he slammed Shayera's mace on the table. "She cannot be dead!" He took a deep breath and met J'onn's eyes. "You ready to go?"

J'onn folded his arms on the table and leaned forward. He lowered his head not making eye contact with John. "We should still wait for the others."

"Listen, I just told you I'm not waiting. I need you to go because you can sense her presence and help me find her quicker. But I'll do it by myself if I have to." John didn't say anything else.

There was a momentary silence, before the Martian stood up and looked at John. "You don't have to go by yourself. I'll go with you. Meet you in five minutes in the launch bay." J'onn walked to the conference room door.

"J'onn!" Stewart called out.

"Yes, Lantern, you are welcome," the Martian responded.

"I know." John said. He lowered his head and softly repeated, "Thanks."

J'onn gave a half-hearted smile and walked through the conference room door.

Mason turned to John. "For a minute there, I didn't think he was going to go."

"I never thought he wouldn't," John answered.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

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CHAPTER FOUR

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Mayeca Wor lay in her bunk facing the center of the cell. Her eyes were closed, but she wasn't asleep. It had been four; maybe five hours since the guards took the Lieutenant out of the cell. The Lieutenant had kicked and punched the guards as they dragged her out of the bed and pushed her toward the cell door. Finally, one of the guards muttered some curse about fighting fate and zapped the Lieutenant with his laser stick and dragged the stunned woman out of the cell.

Wor thought about helping the Lieutenant, but decided it wouldn't have done any good and it would have only served to make the guards angry at her. She couldn't bring herself to think about what was happening to the Lieutenant right now. It had happened to her. It had happened to all of them when they first arrived. The only thing the arrival of the Lieutenant did was ensure they all got an extra day before it was their turn again. Still, no matter what the Lieutenant had done, no one deserved this -- not even her.

Wor didn't move when she heard the cell door open and what she assumed to be the Lieutenant hitting the floor with a soft *thud*. When she heard the cell door *click* close, she opened her eyes. The Lieutenant lay in the middle of the floor, curled in a fetal position, shaking, sniffling. Her smock lay next to her. None of the other women in the cell moved toward her.

"Shut up, traitor," Sergeant Rac called out from her bunk. "No one feels sorry for you."

After a few minutes the sniffling stopped, replaced by silence. In the dim light, Wor could see the Lieutenant crawling toward her bunk. Wor got out of her bed and gently placed her arms around the Lieutenant to help her.  The Lieutenant didn't seem to recognize her and flailed her arms in the air as if trying to fight Wor off with her fists.

"It's alright, Lieutenant," Wor said softly. "It's alright. I've got you. Let me help you."

The Lieutenant looked at Wor with a blank stare and said nothing. As a nurse, Wor had seen that vacant shell-shocked look before. It still bothered her.

Wor helped the woman to the bed. Suddenly, the Lieutenant pointed toward the toilet and started making retching noises as if she were going to throw up. Wor shook her head, but helped the woman to the toilet, helped her kneel down and position her head over the commode; and then watched as the woman struggled to succumb to the nausea she felt.

Wor watched and waited patiently while the Lieutenant slowly discovered what the others had discovered early in their captivity. There would be no moral victory by vomiting away the experience... not now, not ever. Dry heaves would be the only result of this night. Then after tonight -- nothing.

After a few minutes, the Lieutenant, her eyes red, her body still shaking, silently looked up at her. Wor nodded and helped her stand and move back to her bed. Once in bed, the Lieutenant curled into a ball with her back to the center of the cell. Wor covered her with the blanket and picked the smock up off the floor and placed it at the foot of the bed.

Wor lowered her head and walked back to her own bunk avoiding the angry stare of Sergeant Rac.

The room was silent except for halting, whimpering sounds occasionally coming from the Lieutenant. Wor thought it sounded like she was calling for someone named Bon Smear. Maybe that person was one of the Lieutenant's parents, she thought.

"Just think traitor," Rac called out again. "This wouldn't be happening to you … to any of us if you hadn't stopped the bypass. Hope you remember that every time they come for you. You've made a tsat-thoth-na out of every living Thanagarian."

"Shut up, Sergeant!" Wor answered as the Lieutenant's call for Bon Smear stopped.

Mason and J'onn stood in the launch bay next to the damaged Javelin. John had gone inside the ship to download coordinates from the ship's navigational system to his ring. After waiting with J'onn for a few moments, Mason decided to enter the ship and look for John.

He came across John seated in the pilot's chair. He was talking to another Green Lantern via what looked to be a holographic projection. The Lantern, in the projection, was female and very pretty. She had blue skin, blonde hair and dark eyes. Mason could make out just parts of the conversation.

"… you sure about this John?" the female Lantern asked.

"I've never been more sure about anything in my life. Can I depend on you? I need to know I count on you." John replied.

"You can… John, seems you have company behind you," the woman said pointing over John's shoulder.

John turned around and grimaced when he saw Mason who smiled back weakly at the image when he realized he'd been seen. John turned back to the projection.

"You can depend on me, John. I have the coordinates. Green Lantern out," the blue woman said as she terminated the transmission.

As John walked past Mason he said, "Just getting a little insurance."

Kyr Rac watched as the guards entered the cell and set four food trays in the center of the floor. As soon as the guards left, she, Wor and Ces each grabbed a tray and returned to their beds and started eating. Rac looked at the traitor who was still in bed. She'd been silent for the last couple of hours, but Rac was certain she wasn't asleep. Secretly, she was glad the lizards didn't kill the traitor. That was a pleasure she wanted to reserve for herself.

"Hey, traitor. Waiting for somebody to feed you?" Rac hollered. "You'd better get up before they take the food away. You only get fed once a day here. And they might come back for you again tonight. So eat up, so no one has to take your turn."

"Sergeant! Back off," Wor said as she walked over to the traitor's bed. She tapped the side of the bed and called softly, "Lieutenant? Lieutenant, can you sit up?" The traitor cleared her throat and slowly turn over so that she looked into Wor's eyes. Wor, who had been a nurse and had probably seen it all, gasped. So did Rac.

The woman had large bruises on her upper body. Wor gently placed her hand on the woman's shoulder and helped the traitor sit up. She handed her the smock at the foot of the bed.

Wor looked at Rac and then turned and spoke softly to the traitor. "Look. Part of what Sergeant Rac said is true. This is your only meal and they will be back soon to get the trays. I know you don't want to, but you've got to eat. I know you don't think you can hold anything down, but you got to try, otherwise you won't survive."

At first, the traitor stared vacantly at Wor and parroted softly, "Survive." Then as if she'd switched on a light, the stare suddenly became focused and the traitor said firmly, "Yes…survive…I must survive."

Wor nodded at the woman, who now seemed to be listening intently, "If they come back for you, and they might, I will take your turn." Wor glared at Rac as she added, "Just like Corporal Ces did for me after my first time."

Rac watched as Ces picked up the tray from the center of the floor and brought the tray of food over to the traitor's bed.